Ladies,

What do you love the most about your Asian man? Is it the "Asian"ness about him or is it a particular trait he has and his being Asian is just a bonus?

Also, what is something you find hard about them to deal with but love them regardless...

You can tell of past relationships too if you like.

I went back and inserted in this post another question because Mango Girl's post, after I made the original post, kind of inspired me to ask this too:
How did your Asian man (the one you are with now, or one you were with before) inspire you in your life and what positive changes did he make in your life?

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I find that as our relationship goes on I think of us less as an interracial couple and more as just a couple. It really hasn't yet turned out to be a big issue in our relationship, between us or most of the people we are close with. Honestly the things I get pissed at MGB about aren't asian traits, they are just asshole men traits. Just like the good things aren't necessarily asian either.

If I were to appreciate anything that was unique to him as an Asian man, it would just be the new experiences I've had because of him. Mostly food..haha. I'm now addicted to the rice cooker and I was adamant on not needing one before. I've tried many new foods, including tripe(ok that one wasn't a favorite). But some good ones, the big fat Korean pears, kalbi, pho, thai food (god I am addicted to spicy basil dishes). And last week I couldn't eat enough greens. Kinda glad he introduced different asian greens, because these southern american ones are a bit on the yuck side for me. But I love napa cabbage, chinese broccoli, watercress, bok choy, mmmm. Plus the produce at the Asian market is super cheap. I was intimidated to go shopping in one before him, now I almost feel like a pro in there. It was kinda funny, there was a new guy working at the store last week, and he kept asking me if I needed help and I was like nope! I guess he figured the white chick should be lost.

Being addicted to the rice cooker means I usually have some hot and ready to go at all times, so I've been doing alot of stir-fries and then fried rices when it dries out. MGB teases me that I'm becoming Chinese. Although the last couple days I've been making sushi rolls with my rice. Something I would have been intimidated to try if he hadn't convinced me it was so easy to do.

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It's always nice to experience new things. I am sorry your ex turned out to be such an ass, but then you wouldn't be with MGB, a man that obviously loves you. Seems to me you turned out the lucky one and you deserve it.

To me, one of the most wonderful experiences of being with a man from a different Culture, is you learn things you might not have tried if you hadn't have met them. A man from any Asian Culture can do that for white girls like us.

Just takes someone like us that is open minded enough to see it.

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Ladies,

What do you love the most about your Asian man? Is it the "Asian"ness about him or is it a particular trait he has and his being Asian is just a bonus?

Hard to say. Loyalty would be one trait, then the fact that some Asian guys cause me to feel that i'm a queen. Before the disappearing act, my Korean ex seemed to care more for my pleasure than his own, which was pretty new to me. My Chinese ex spent a lot of time talking to me about everything, and that guy was going for his PhD!

Also, what is something you find hard about them to deal with but love them regardless...

Tempers and the fact that they're good at hiding secrets from people. I still don't know why either of them left me, and i still don't know anything about my Korean ex.

How did your Asian man (the one you are with now, or one you were with before) inspire you in your life and what positive changes did he make in your life?

If it weren't for either of my exs, i wouldn't have gotten interested in learning about the Asian cultures, music and dramas especially. Also, even if i dated them briefly, they helped me see that i didn't make a foolish decision in deciding to date Asians only, and that anything is possible.

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Once you go Asian, you'll never go caucasian

I suppose I should answer my own questions, right?

What do you love the most about your Asian man? Is it the "Asian"ness about him or is it a particular trait he has and his being Asian is just a bonus?

I would say that the personality is the most important to me. The fact that he would be Asian is definitely an added bonus. I will tell you why. It's because I feel comfortable with Asian men overall. It's also because I know about Asian Culture and I am more in tune to that side. I don't mean the dominant male side of the Culture, I mean the usual ethics Asian men have from it.

Also, what is something you find hard about them to deal with but love them regardless...

I will be honest and tell you that I can't stand a man that tries to control me. By this I mean tries to change me as a person or tries to control how I think and feel. I have had a couple of Asian men like this and that does not go over with me.. but I have also dated a couple of white guys like that too.. so it's not necessarily an Asian man thing. Know what I mean? When I encountered this "problem" with the Asian men I dated, I loved them and accepted them overall, but this "control" thing definitely killed the relationship. I can love someone with faults of course, just not when it dominates the relationship and it overpowers the beautiful side of it. It's then you find yourself constantly struggling to deal with his control problem and it drains the love out of you eventually.

How did your Asian man (the one you are with now, or one you were with before) inspire you in your life and what positive changes did he make in your life?

Since I dated all races of men since i started dating at 15, I never had to go through an adjustment period that some people do when they date someone of another race the first time when they are older and things get more serious. So, I can't speak from the interracial adjustment point of view.. however, I can speak from the Cultural side. Race has not so much been an issue with me with Asian men.. it was the difference in Culture and their family. A couple of very serious relationships I had were with Asian men and I can say that my experiences with them and their family taught me how to stand up for myself and to never stop when I really want something. I won a few battles with the Asian family and I lost a couple. I learned a lot about Asian Culture from them and how to accept a different point of view in differences. I learned how to cook some outstanding Asian meals. I learned a little of the language. I learned how to be more submissive.. yeah guys, you read right. I know I am independent to a large degree, but dating some Asian men have taught me how to be a bit more submissive. I wouldn't trade what I learned from dating and loving Asian men for anything. And I honestly mean that.

Dang, sorry guys,.... I didn't realize I was going to write a friggin novel.

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ProAzn,

Firstly, an amazing site you've started! Thanks! Actually,not all Asian men want their ladies to be "submissive". I think I can speak for at least some: we do appreciate reasonable deviation from our own views (of course, the degree of reasonability varies with individuals). But some may not favor girls who like to argue. I do know of Asian girls who never seem to know how to back off from an argument; and they are in love with those Asian guys who can put up with their temperament.

What is important is knowing that in a relationship - with Asians or otherwise - there is always giving and taking, and forgiveness...

Hmmm it is hard for me to say now because I am sadly not in love..

I just generally enjoy their respect they have for others. their attitude on life and thier over all HOTNESS lol

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Its not just one trait its his whole being. The way he carries himself. He is a great conundrum of confidence and shyness. When he is open with me there is no turning back. Everything he does whether its positive or negative is 100% genuine. Even just being friends or aquaintences there are no questions just reality that we are both making in that moment.

Physically Asian features are a added bonus. I find many different men attractive but when I want to be close and give my heart and body to someone I want them to look back at me with bedroom deep dark eyes that make me melt. As for being asian there is no garauntee that a Asian guy will be all up in Asian culture especially if he is westernized. Although I hope he would appreciate my interest in learning his background instead of overshadowing that.

The guys I date now are extremely elusive but still bossy even if we arent commited. I am very big on family and being together and pda. There are 2 in my life which are constants but they arent around enough for me to trust them. I hope with time as I better myself this will get easier.

He made me realize Asian men are Men and not some commodity or trophy. That a real person with a genuine smile can steal your heart whatever ethnicity they are.

What do you love the most about your Asian man? Is it the "Asian"ness about him or is it a particular trait he has and his being Asian is just a bonus?

My Korean man is just so affectionate and he is conservative, but he can be so sensitive too.

Also, what is something you find hard about them to deal with but love them regardless...

I think the hardest thing to deal with my man is his temper. I might get yelled at for saying this but he isn't the only Korean guy I dated. It seems to be a Korean trait of tempers. Has anyone else noticed that?


How did your Asian man (the one you are with now, or one you were with before) inspire you in your life and what positive changes did he make in your life?

Although my man now is not my first Korean boyfriend, with this man I became more interested in Korean Culture and wanting to understand it. I know it has to do with loving him more than anyone, but with him, I found myself wanting to learn the language. He has made me understand things about myself as well.