I have a friend who is 20 and a college student. She has no married or divorced friends. But last year she became involved with a divorcee which has left her with a lot of unanswered questions.

How long does it typically take for someone to 'get over' a divorce? Did you experience a lot of trouble when you started dating again after your divorce? Do you ever fully recover from a divorce? Any other things she should know when dealing with a male divorcee (who's wife left him)?

She's too shy to join as a member so she told me to ask. LOL. Personally I can't even begin to imagine what a divorce is like... (having never been married or broken up from a long term relationship).

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im divorced, i was very ready to move on and improve my life. the only thing that was frustrating was having to go over things over and over until both parties agreed on things. My ex didnt seem all that hurt about the divorce either, he had a girlfriend the same week i ended things so...lol

Going through divorce is hell, but after a while you feel like a huge, ugly weight has been lifted from your shoulders.

That is...if you're an adaptable person who looks ahead to the future instead of looking back. That's the healthy way to be.

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Lioness

it's hard..everyone is different, but "they" say it takes about half the time you were with someone to be truely over them. So 10 year marriage = 5 years of baggage.

I'll let ya know when I'm recovered from mine!

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What she said ...

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So many (Asian) men ... so little time ... ha ha

I am divorced too and how hurtful that is depends on the state of the marriage before you divorced. I was very unhappy in my marriage and to leave him and eventually divorce him was nothing but a relief. By the time I got divorced I was over him since a long time. I felt that big pain during the marriage and then eventually long before I left him all my feelings for him had died and at the actual seperation there was no pain anymore. Only relief.

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WARNING: I cannot be held responsible for the above, as apparently my cats have learned how to type.

It depends on the person. Some people take forever and some are over it before it even happens. If the guy she is dating is still down about his divorce tell her to leave him right now.

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I am keeping my eye on you

So harsh! I wouldn't necessarily tell her to leave him "right now". More like if she feels genuine love (and I mean, LOVE) for him, then she should give him however long it takes....unless it ends up being 5 years.

I was married 11+ years and it took me about a year and a half to start looking for another relationship.

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You can listen to thunder after lightning and tell how close you came to getting hit. If you don't hear it, you got hit, so never mind. ~Unknown

http://www.section-viii.com

i'm over the relationship of 13yrs, the divorce was alot easier then i thought it would be.. having support helps too.

i'm bitter.. about the hardship that was given to me, and how it feels like i didnt exist.. or our children. I wasn't even moved out for a month, when he met and just now imported his mail orderd pinay wife!( something i think he had planed months before... even could have been years!There is a "question" i have knowing their story and how they met!)suppose i was on a need to know basis along with his imaginary friends.

but yet.. can't pay any child support?? or Alimony..??(to make this statment clear for the lurkers out there!! ( i suppose his voices told him to do that..??)somethings are just to recent.

BUT!! so happen.. i met the man of my dreams durring all this hardship. I think a person's kindness.. can reshape the heart. Giving yourself that chance is whats important.. i keep telling myself, not to let the past affect me and live for today. It helps.. when the person you are with is willing to be patient with you. having unconditional love is the key.(IMHO)

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!girl scouts! "to build girls of courage, confidence, and character, who make the world a better place."

hmm, I don't agree with this. It can add stess to a relationship, but being upset over a failed marriage doesn't necessarily mean you still are in love with your x.

Some wounds just take longer to heal, doesn't mean you have to be alone while it does.

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