i know exactly what i want but i often feel like that person is out of my league. so, i end up settling for a guy, like the one i just broke up with today, who was all wrong for me, AND I KNEW THAT FROM THE BEGINNING, but i stayed with him for a year, AND NOW LOOK WHERE THAT GOT ME!!!

this guy was the worst of all the guys i've dated. i've never dated a bad guy, but he was the worst of the nice guys. UGH. my friend told me she "knows" that if he comes crying back i'll take him back, and even though i kind of want to, i really don't!

what is with that little part of me that settles for less? even his own mother said i could do better.... so why can't i?????????????!

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cramming a latte

...for fear that you can't get the right guy so you settle for the next best (or worst) thing that passes by. Might be a self esteem, self confidence, or inferiority complex issue going back to childhood which is usually the case.. Also parenting methods. Many asian parents tend to condescend towards their kids in front of others, often telling the other adult openly their kids are "bad", not "good enough", grades aren't "high enough", etc. It's supposed to be a form of face or respect to the other adult by putting them on a higher pedestal. Instead the offsetting effect causes the child to lose confidence, think they are worth nothing, or become reserved and clam up. Therefore the child may not try as hard as their potential can go and "settle" for the lesser triumph so to speak. Asians in general tend not to focus or believe much in child psychology or mental issues in general.. though it is slowly changing as negative cultural barriers towards mental fitness get broken down in the far east.

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throughout this past relationship i was in constant battle with myself.
he has a really pure and gentle soul. even though he's covered with tattoos and piercings he is extremely innocent. i always feel like the bad person even when he gives me reason to be angry. i often get scared that i won't meet someone who will treat me with as much respect and freedom as he does.

i don't know what i'm so afraid of. =(
why can't i meet a guy who is successful in life. not rich, but who has accomplished most of his goals and is happy with where his life is. why do i keep dating guys who are in the process... but more likely in the process of failing?

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cramming a latte

Just do what all the other women do. Keep three or four guys hanging, just in case.

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"I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uh, some people out there in our nation don't have maps, and, uh, I believe that our education like such as in South Africa and, uh, the Iraq everywhere like, such as, and I believe that they should, our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S., er, should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future for our children."

if i could, i probably would. =(

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cramming a latte

You're pretty, and you could, but you just don't want to. No one will know if you're available if you don't present yourself in such a way.

Or you can just forgo the relationship nonsense and just live life as it is and be happy. There's too much of an emphasis in society to get hitched, have rug rats and live happily ever after.

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"I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uh, some people out there in our nation don't have maps, and, uh, I believe that our education like such as in South Africa and, uh, the Iraq everywhere like, such as, and I believe that they should, our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S., er, should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future for our children."

hehe, that's what my mom always says. she tells me to stay single, work hard, and on my free time travel the world.

i think i'm actually better single, but i don't deal well with breakups. i cave easily.

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cramming a latte

Basically as the saying goes... money talks, bs walks. You can do anything when you're successful; having a relationship doesn't guarantee you can. Too many unknown variables.. Best revenge is success. I believe in that. hehe.

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Here's another saying...

Out of sight, out of mind.

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"I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uh, some people out there in our nation don't have maps, and, uh, I believe that our education like such as in South Africa and, uh, the Iraq everywhere like, such as, and I believe that they should, our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S., er, should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future for our children."

I totally relate to this, I've dated loser after loser until finally I've just come to the conclusion that I lost my one true love (out of my own ignorence and lost his trust) and so now I'll have to settle for less than I want/deserve. We only get one true love in life, I've lost mine but maybe you havn't met yours yet, until then don't settle, and learn from my mistake, and BE HONEST!!!!!!!!!! WHEN YOU FIND HIM!

I'm around if u need a girl to talk to.