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| Member Stories & Literature Post your written Literature, stories and articles (written by you) here. Do not post erotic stories in here. |
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| Tags: ago, awhile, poem, untitle, wrote |
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09-03-2007, 12:42 PM
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An untitle poem I wrote awhile ago.
A voice inside my head
keeps ringing through my ears. I'm lying on my bed thinking about my fears. Reoccurring nightmares bidding me farewell Watch closely as the world around you, goes tumbling down to hell. With all we love and cherish Calling out our names Their last abiding wishes perish Pandemonium has more games. There's no more plans to execute No more friends to call Watch as your world around you crumbles And we finally begin to fall.
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I'd rather be out in the summer rain Getting soaked yeah I wouldn't complain But I think too much and I'm left to blame Feeling strangely the same I'm drawing pictures around your name Conversation slowly sketched away With the words I could not say Couldn't find anyway 
    
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09-03-2007, 01:12 PM
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that's beautiful you're very talented
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09-03-2007, 01:37 PM
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That is very very good. I have already noticed that you have a writing talent. I would call the title something like "Mind Hell" or "The Illusion" something like that. But I am sure you will think of a cracking title for it.
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ProAzn.com on Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/ProAznCommunity Wiki-ABOUT US http://www.aboutus.org/Proazn.com
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09-03-2007, 02:01 PM
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Wow, that's a great poem, good job in keeping the tone the same throughout.
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Once you go Asian, you'll never go caucasian
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09-03-2007, 02:05 PM
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Quote:
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09-03-2007, 04:38 PM
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Thanks everyone. I think I have a title now.
__________________
I'd rather be out in the summer rain Getting soaked yeah I wouldn't complain But I think too much and I'm left to blame Feeling strangely the same I'm drawing pictures around your name Conversation slowly sketched away With the words I could not say Couldn't find anyway
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09-03-2007, 04:40 PM
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Thanks to ProAzn, I'm going to call it "Hell's Illusionary Dance"
__________________
I'd rather be out in the summer rain Getting soaked yeah I wouldn't complain But I think too much and I'm left to blame Feeling strangely the same I'm drawing pictures around your name Conversation slowly sketched away With the words I could not say Couldn't find anyway
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09-03-2007, 04:57 PM
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Quote:
__________________
ProAzn.com on Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/ProAznCommunity Wiki-ABOUT US http://www.aboutus.org/Proazn.com
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09-03-2007, 10:13 PM
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Can i save this? This is one of the most simplest, yet very well thought and understandable poems i have ever read.
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09-04-2007, 02:04 AM
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wbirkin.
Sure you can save it. By all means go ahead.
__________________
I'd rather be out in the summer rain Getting soaked yeah I wouldn't complain But I think too much and I'm left to blame Feeling strangely the same I'm drawing pictures around your name Conversation slowly sketched away With the words I could not say Couldn't find anyway
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