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Old 05-12-2008, 09:48 PM
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Originally Posted by mango girl View Post
We didn't make MGB and I. In the end the differences just outweighed what was good.

Lessons learned:

Culture clashes are really major problems. Both sides must have an understanding of where the other person is coming from or resentment just builds.

don't use negative terms when dealing with cross-cultural issues. Different approaches are not wrong, or stupid, they are simply different. Respect the other position, come from a position of understanding each other's point of view and don't belittle it. When judging the actions of the other person, try judge them from their point of view, not yours. Then again, I guess empathy is the heart of every good relationship, interracial ones just need larger doses of it.
Indeed. The premise holds true regardless. Not just IR relationships but treatment in any relationship whether race is an issue or not. Even in friendships...

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  #22 (permalink)  
Old 05-13-2008, 10:42 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mango girl View Post
We didn't make MGB and I. In the end the differences just outweighed what was good.

Lessons learned:

Culture clashes are really major problems. Both sides must have an understanding of where the other person is coming from or resentment just builds.

don't use negative terms when dealing with cross-cultural issues. Different approaches are not wrong, or stupid, they are simply different. Respect the other position, come from a position of understanding each other's point of view and don't belittle it. When judging the actions of the other person, try judge them from their point of view, not yours. Then again, I guess empathy is the heart of every good relationship, interracial ones just need larger doses of it.
How very true.

PS: That comment about flossing your ass with skinny asian guys is really funny. I have a laugh everytime I read it.
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  #23 (permalink)  
Old 05-13-2008, 11:20 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mango girl View Post
We didn't make MGB and I. In the end the differences just outweighed what was good.

Lessons learned:

Culture clashes are really major problems. Both sides must have an understanding of where the other person is coming from or resentment just builds.

don't use negative terms when dealing with cross-cultural issues. Different approaches are not wrong, or stupid, they are simply different. Respect the other position, come from a position of understanding each other's point of view and don't belittle it. When judging the actions of the other person, try judge them from their point of view, not yours. Then again, I guess empathy is the heart of every good relationship, interracial ones just need larger doses of it.

Yes that's true.

This was also your first interracial relationship. Any you might have after this one will be easier to deal with because you have already been there.

Having said that, take it from me, it's better finding a man that without doubt, wants a non-Asian woman in his life. It's just better that way. Then you don't have to worry that since you aren't Asian, that he won't want you etc.

Also, don't lose faith in Asian men just because your first relationship with one didn't work out.. There are some awesome Asian men out there that would be able to handle you being white and it wouldn't be an issue for him. I know the next guy may not be Asian, it's just I hope you don't rule out Asian men all together is all.

But who the hell am I telling? You know all this...LOL
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