Have any of you had family or friends that just seem to interfere in your life and your business?

You know, the kind that seem to feel they can push off their opinions on you about how you lead your life or what friends you have.

How do you handle them? Do you just ignore them? or do they have influence over you?

Do you think it's right that they interfere in your life, or do you think that what's your business should stay that way? I know some family and friends think that they have a right because they care about you. but when is enough simply ENOUGH?

What about a lover or boyfriend? How much right do they have to interfere with your private things; etc such as bank account etc.. email..

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My family has some influence but I am learning to make mistakes more often. I find that it's 50/50 with them. Yes in some ways they are right but many forget that other family members have to learn about letting go and letting others make mistakes.

I deal with it without really telling them about things especially in regards to who I am dating and who my friends are. I learned long ago, my family is very critical at times.

Yes in some ways it is their business because they think it is their way of being protective of their kids. When I feel when enough is enough, then I don't discuss that issue with them even when they ask questions. I tend to walk away and do other things.

I believe that in any relationship, there should be some privacy and space. I really don't want to get involved with a woman's bank account or their email. There are things that I feel it is their business even guys' phone numbers and text messages. Things like this should be discussed right away before problems arise. I do believe that a woman I am dating should have similiar views. I usually tell women that most of my "friends" are women. I am comfortable if a woman has lots of "guy" friends too.

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My family has really good boundaries, for the most part. My one sister-in-law is a bit pushy at times, but she's a social worker, so I just chalk it up to good intentions. She thinks my family isn't close enough. She's Jewish too, so it maybe in part to cultural differences.

I tend to be pretty open book with a lover, of course depending on the level of commitment. That's one relationship which should be your innermost circle of trust.

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I don't mind constructive criticism from family and friends. Ultimately I think they want what's good for me. However, if they are nosey and butt into every little itty bitty thing that I do without my permission then yea, I get pissed off big time. Things like prying into emails, back accounts, etc. would do it. People who do that won't ever get the time of day from me ever again. They are dead to me and I ignore them completely. Sorry that sounds harsh but having been a victim of identity theft I don't take encroaching my private affairs lightly.

...and that's a reason why some guys get all reserved and aloof cause people can't mind their own damn business. They clam up!

I have a nosy sister who seems to think she can just help herself to my personal stuff. Also she likes to look at my information behind my back. It is so not cool.

I think your business is your own business and people should keep their noses out of it unless they are invited

I think this would be a much bigger issue for asians, since duty to the family/parents is emphasized, and personal boundaries can be practically non-existent.
In my own case, my mom has in the past been the type to try to push her agenda on myself and my siblings. I mean she would not have had any idea of personal boundaries anyway. Her reasoning was obviously that it was for my own good and that she cared for me. I totally disagree with this since I don't think that she or anyone else truly understands what it's like to be me, and so does not truly know what's best for me. Even if she is totally right I still want to make my own decisions. After all I am the one who has to live with the consequences of the decisions that are made about my life. This is also the reason why I don't usually give advice to people or tell my younger siblings what to do, since I figure they are the ones who have to deal with the consequences. Note that I am differentiating between giving an opinion and pushing it onto someone.
It was after I had lived on my own, away from my family for many years that I realized I didn't want my mom or anyone else running my life. Then when my mom did try to tell me what to do I stood up to her and made it clear that I was going to do things my own way. So my mom pretty much stopped trying to tell me or my siblings how to live our lives. I do have relatives that would have judgements about me and expect me to do as they would want, but I pretty much ignore them, since I don't have that much contact with them anyway. I don't have any friends who would try to tell me what to do. Unlike family, friends are those I can choose so anyone who was pushing his agenda on me would not be a friend for long.
I don't think that a significant other should be pushing his/her agenda in a relationship either. I wouldn't like a spouse to be snooping around my email or bank accounts. I wouldn't have a problem with her wanting to know, it would be the snooping around that would bother me. But in this case I would be totally transparent anyway. So if she wanted to know anything all she would have to do is ask and I'd show it to her. In fact I'd probably let her know of anything worth knowing even without her asking.

yes. basically all the women in my family?

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