I am facing a situation at my present job where I believe this guy is starting to sexually harrass me.

Let me tell you what's going on. There is this guy I work with that is beginning to worry me. I have been working there for 7 months now and at first, the guy just would give me compliments. He would say "Shelby, you look really nice today". Sometimes I would catch him staring at me or my ass and then he would look away when he could see I saw him. So far, he hadn't said anything to me.

Lately, he started making jokes that suggested sexual innuendos and such. He knows I have a boyfriend because he has seen him come in and take me to lunch or take me to work and pick me up. I am pretty sure that I have never given him any kind of sign that I was interested in him in any way other than as a co-worker.

Anyway, he seems to be getting more bold. Yesterday, he reached across me to get something and he "accidentally" brushed against my right breast. Now, he could of asked me to pass this object to him but instead he did that.

I am not the type of girl that freaks out and starts screaming sexual harrassment just because a guy compliments me. It didn't bother me at all when I first started there when he would tell me I looked nice that day. But I am really starting to get major uncomfortable around him. I am thinking of contacting Human Resources, or talking to my boss about it. My boyfriend is really pissed off about it.

Have any of you had to deal with sexual harrassment at work? This also means any of you men too because not only women can be sexually harrassed at work. How did you handle it if you did get harrassed and what happened?

Taking it up to the HR person is usually company code. I would suggest that. If anything, they might just give the guy an indirect warning/heads-up to straighten up his act.

I dont have a job yet.So I never met that.I think radslug is right,go to the HR,they will deal with it.
wish you good luck

I have had to deal with sexual harrassment on 3 different jobs.

The first time it happened, it was this guy that said to me "Sit on my face". At first I was shocked because he just said it out of the blue. Then he kept doing it afterwards. It got so bad that I ended up going to Human Resources. It worked. Apparently, he also harrassed another girl in the same company so he was fired when I reported my case.

The second time was with a Boss. Since he was the actual owner of the company, I couldn't really fight it. It was very bad also because he cornered me in the back office and forced kissed me while feeling up my breasts. I broke away from him, went home immediately and called the police. Nothing came of it because he denied it of course. I never went back.

The third time was with this guy that worked in the same section I did and he started out like your guy with just complimenting me all the time. That didn't bother me until he really started to make it obvious. He came up behind me one time and pressed into me from behind to show me his "boner". That was when I turned around, slapped the hell out of him and reported him to Human Resources.


I would first say something to him Shelby. Tell him to please not get close to you anymore or you will report him. IF that doesn't stop him, go to HR immediately. Sometimes just saying something stops them. But if he is doing this now, he will only get worse.

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Taking it up with HR is a route. I would suggest that you bring in a small voice recorder or have a web cam attached to your desk and keep it on as a precaution. That way if there is any question of the validity of your complaints, you'd have evidence.

Did you tell him to never reach over you like that again? Either way, you should make it clear that it wasn't appreciated so he clearly understands. I don't know anyone who wouldn't ask someone to pass whatever he was reaching for. Or maybe what he wanted to reach for, wasn't on your desk. Do yourself a favour and keep logs, times, of the things he does that makes you feel uncomfortable. The more verbose the better.

Good luck!

P.S. Ask HR if they allow stun guns in the place.

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HR likes to have evidence before they enact on anything, much like the police. They want to see you've done everything within your power to stop it. Other wise it makes you look like you're crying wolf and gives you a bad rep within the employer's eyes. Whistle blowers have been treated far worse than the instigators as we know from history...

1. Have you tried telling him to leave you alone? How many times? What words, phrases were used on both sides? Document them and provide a time line. They want to see a repetitive pattern before they tell him to hit the road. Many a time employers would rather "solve" the issue than let a highly valued employee go even if he/she's the ass shat harasser. Also make sure your dress code is up to par. Some employers make it their way to accuse the victim and any little sign you used to entice the instigator could be used against you regardless. It's the employers way to shove it under the table and close the book.

2. Provide that info to your immediate boss if #1. doesn't work. Make sure he follows proper procedure to stop that individual or have a meeting with that person's boss to ensure it doesn't happen again. At this point, HR will be involved anyway and certainly be present as an observer in the meetings with both you and the alleged harasser. Most cases, the buck stops here and the person stops, goes away on their own or potentially fired.

3. If #2 doesn't work, go directly to the senior HR manager bringing all the evidence from #1 and #2. At this point if nothing is done you may want to have a lawyer/police involved depending on the severity. All companies hate bad PR and unfortunately some don't wait till it gets to this stage before acting. You may want to look for another job too. I mean who wants to have an non-supportive management staff on a valid complaint regardless of how much you're paid.


Let us know what happens Shelby. Good luck.

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Yea, that's essentially what I've been told by HR. Make sure you document everything and provide it as evidence when called upon to do so. If there are no witnesses have documentation or other forms of evidence makes your case stronger, even if circumstantial from 3rd party eyes.

.........

Shelby,

Get the information for your state's labor harassment toll free number just in case this employer won't do anything to stop the guy. Plus get an attorney on side if you have to. Your employer cannot get rid of you just because you are involved in a harrassment issue.

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I told him a couple of days ago that I was not comfortable with the things he was doing.

He so far has left me alone. Let's see if he keeps to that.

That's fantastic Shelby. Pop him if he bothers you again.

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